Tuesday, April 13, 2010

I fear those who read

I fear those who read

Not sure when it has started, i fear those who read. Just like we would never know when winter approaches, we can only feel the darkness of the night, becoming longer and longer.
I fear those who read. Once our conversation starts i become so transparent that the paleness of my brain can no longer be hidden. The cultivation that i possess is merely the popular norms that everyone knows. Like the heart in the left chest, summer comes after spring and the president of the United States is the most powerful man in the world. On the contrary, those who read glide and surf in the knowledge sea. From cooking recipes to management theories, from gossip magazines to the society trends, even a leaping cat inspire a discussion of the earthquake mechanism in architecture. In comparison, I am just a tape recorder in the MP3 generation; outdated, un-adjustable. The ideas that i am most proud of are probably written in a paragraph of a book that sits on his shelf for years. Those paragraphs are which not even being highlighted.


I fear those who read. When they start reading, their faces are hidden behind the books. When they put down the book, they appear as noble rulers who glow splendidly with confidence at ease. Enable me to realise that reading is not only knowledge, it is magic. They are the Newton who knows esthetics by heart. They are the Van Goh who is keen in anthropology. They are the Gandhi who knows Sun Tzu, the art of war. Answers are floating in their vain and lesser questions can make them fear. As if standing on the shoulders of a giant, they are accustomed to overlook the world from above. That calm confident is the best looking face in the world.

I fear those who read. for the reason that they are lucky; When other embrace loneliness or being swallowed by loneliness, their lives are never self-contained. They are never lack of loyal friends, never lack of gentleness of comforting hands; not even lack of competitive rivals. When they read, there are times they praise out loud for a point well taken and other times, due to different stand points, they involved themselves in fierce arguments. There are also times when they get guidance and comfort. Everything is given away with no conditions, like companion love, like passionate friendship. Each and every single book acts as the vertebra of the spine, steadily supports the reader. Take a look; an opened book naturally forms a shape of the embracing hands. All this isn't it what we spend all our lives looking for?


I fear those who read. They are never content. Some say, the day women started reading was the beginning of feminism. Since women starts to ask question, they ended up reading even more. Einstein, the wisest man in the world once said in his dying breath: "I see myself as a child playing on the beach who is happy to find a smooth little rock. Then i realised that what i am faced with is the never ending sea of truth.'" Readers dig deep into the books, busily watering their own thirst. They make themselves an open bucket, always ready to be filled with more and more. As for me, holding onto the little rock is only for the purpose of stone skipping. A joke used to say: when one forces oneself to swallow a toad every morning, no matter what is going to happen, one will never be afraid. I think, I am about to find out the taste of the toad.

I fear those who read. I prayed for them never knowing my anxiety or else they can beat me easier or even lose the will to fight me. I severely fear those who read because they aim to be great. Even they do not make it in the end, they are still successful out of my reach. I fear those who read because they know "ignorance" makes only the children naive but i am already an adult. I fear those who read because everyone like people with wisdom. I fear those who read because the can prevent failure for which i am going to face. I fear those who read because they know that life is too short and people always get wise too late. I fear those who read because an hour of their time is my entire life.

I fear those who read. Especially those who are still reading.



-2009 Asian Federation of Advertising Associations - Best Copywriting in Print.



Friday, January 29, 2010

2010 Handbook for you & your family..

Health:

1. Drink plenty of water.
2. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a beggar.
3. Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants.
4. Live with the 3 E's -- Energy, Enthusiasm, and Empathy.
5. Make time to pray.
6. Play more games.
7.. Read more books than you did in 2009.
8. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day.
9. Sleep for 7 hours.
10. Take a 10-30 minutes walk every day. And while you walk, smile.

Personality:

11. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
12. Don't have negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.
13. Don't over do. Keep your limits.
14. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
15. Don't waste your precious energy on gossip.
16. Dream more while you are awake.
17. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
18. Forget issues of the past. Don't remind your partner with his/her mistakes of the past. That will ruin your present happiness.
19. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don't hate others.
20. Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present.
21. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
22. Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn.
23. Smile and laugh more.
24. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

Society:

25. Call your family often.
26. Each day give something good to others.
27. Forgive everyone for everything.
28. Spend time with people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6.
29.. Try to make at least three people smile each day.
30. What other people think of you is none of your business.
31. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.

Life:

32. Do the right thing!
33. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
34. GOD heals everything.
35. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
36. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
37. The best is yet to come.
38. When you awake alive in the morning, thank GOD for it.
39. So, be happy.

Last but not the least:
40. Please Forward this to everyone you care about. I Just Did !!


>> Thanks Hani <<

Thursday, November 26, 2009

quotable quotes

some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go

- Oscar Wilde

Friday, November 20, 2009

the walls do talk..

school myths.

i posted an entry about a school myth - the one if you keep a pencil as short as your pinky, your mum will die..

last night Medina brought back another thing - if you want to know how many boys & girls you will get, take a strand of your hair and put inside your elbow, and then squeeze your hand 5 times. and when you open your arms if the hair becomes zigzagged, you'll get a girl. and if it is straight, you'll get a boy. do it couple of times and you'll know how many boys & how many girls you'll get.

i remembered doing that in primary school, and also other myths like the pencil. and i haven't heard about it since until last night. and my school was in Lumut.. and it was 24 years ago! but the story lived..

so, theory:

1) can't be the mother who told them. what kind of parent would she be?

2) can't be the teachers who told them. what kind of teachers would they be?

3) sisters? i don't remember my sisters told me this sort of things.

4) school janitors? the ones who worked in the school for 10 - 20 years.. maybe?

5) text book? naaah..

6) THE WALLS..!!! what else...?

..or it will remain a mystery. until somebody would write a thesis about this. interesting.

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Paths of Glory - Jeffrey Archer

Yes i read Jeffrey Archer. and i just finished his latest book Paths of Glory.. Its actually based on a true story that took place in 1920's.. about a mountaineer George Mallory and his attempt to be the first man to step foot on the top of the world - Mount Everest or as he refers it Chomolungma, Goddess Mother of the Earth.

Interesting read. since i've never read anything regarding mountain climbing. so today i googled George Mallory..

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/British_Mount_Everest_Expedition_1924


it is a true story..

His expedition took place in 1924 and his body were found in 1999 at the place marked +1 along with his climbing partner Irvine. Until today, they don't know whether these two men actually made it to the summit or not.. but according to Jeffrey Archer, they did!


The feeling of finishing a book, is just indescribable. i always take a moment and smile and sometimes i would hug the book.. before placing it on the bookshelf with the rest. but the story will linger in my mind for at least a week.


Next book: The Lost Symbol - Dan Brown.





Wednesday, October 21, 2009

TO ALL THE KIDS WHO WERE BORN IN THE 30's, 40's, 50's 60's and 70's

found this on facebook:

First, we survived being born to mothers who had no full time maids/cooked food/cleaned the house while they carried us.

They took aspirin, ate cheese, sweet dishes and didn't get tested for diabetes.

Then after trauma, our baby cribs (if we had one, most likely lying on the floor) were covered with bright coloured lead based paints.

We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets, not to mention the risks we took hitch hiking.

As children, we would ride in cars with no seat belts or air bags.

Riding in the back of a local bus/train was a special treat.
We drank water from the tap and NOT from a bottle.
We would spend hours on the terrace under bright sunlight flying our kites, without ever worrying about the UV effects which never ever affected us.
We share one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle and NO ONE actually died from this.
We ate pastries, white bread and real butter and drank soft drinks with sugar in it, because we weren't overweight BECAUSE..........

WE WERE ALWAYS OUTSIDE PLAYING!!!!

We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the street lights came on. No one was able to reach us all day. And we were O.K.

We would spend hours repairing our dated bicycle and scooter out of scraps and then ride down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a few times, we learned to solve the problem.

We did not have Playstations, Nintendo's. X-boxes, no video games at all, no 99 channels on cable, no video tape movies, no surround sound, no cell phones, no personal computers, no Internet or Internet chat rooms ........! WE HAD FRIENDS and we went outside and found them!

We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and there were no lawsuits from these accidents. We ate worms and mud pies from dirt and the worms did not live in us forever.

We were never given BB guns for our 10th birthday, we made up games with sticks and tennis balls and although we were told it would happen, we did not put out very many eyes.

We rode bikes or walked to a friend's house and knocked on the door or rang the bell or heck just yelled for them!

Cricket leagues had tryouts and not everyone made the team. Those who didn't had to learn to deal with disappointment. Imagine that!!!

The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law was unheard of. They actually sided with the law (and our teachers too!!!) ouch!!!

This generation has produced some of the best risk takers, problem solvers and inventors ever. The past 50 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas.

We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned
HOW TO DEAL WITH IT ALL And YOU are one of them!!

CONGRATULATIONS!!!

YOU might want to share this with others who have had the luck to grow up as kids, before the lawyers and the government regulated our lives for our own good and while you are at it, forward this to your kids so they will know how brave their parents were.

Kind of makes you want to run through the house with scissors, doesn't it?!!!!

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

2009 so far..

How's my life been treating me so far..

ON KIDS:

Umar is on the "Tantrum" stage. Especially when putting on clothes. Particularly his pants. Don't know why he doesn't like to wear them. Sometimes its too long and it restricts his movement. But sometimes it goes for all pants/ shorts. So i'll let him go pants-less whenever he's in the house. This picture was taken after he rolled on the floor asking to take off the jeans. We were getting ready to go to the hospital.

He's also on a "Separation Anxiety" stage. The most horrible part of the day when i had to leave for work. Up till today, God knows how many brain cells of his had been damaged by head banging.

Daddy said don't give in to him. Ignore his tantrums.. and he'll get over it. Yeah it works.. but good-bye brain cells!

His allergic to cold drinks. he'll get pretty bad wheeze after taking them. But could not help it whenever he's at the Cafe. Ice cold drinks are everywhere and everybody is drinking them. Come Monday, he'll wake up wheezing.

Last Monday he woke up with bad wheezing and a fever. I panicked. Took time off from work and called his Pediatrician at Assunta Hospital. Afraid it might be Lung infection. Aren't those the symptoms? fever and bad wheezing. The night before i was observing his chest and it was going up and down really bad. Thank God he's off the dummy due to a mouth ulcer. So it helps that he's getting air in from the mouth. That's another thing. He had not been eating and drinking cos of the pain in the mouth and the sliver keeps drooling out. Susu or oo' oo' (thats how he pronounced it) pun tak nak dah.

I studied Computer Science in University not Medical. When we saw the Dr, i asked him a milllion +1 question. He prescribe medicine for the fever, the runing nose, for the ulcer, the wheezing & something for prevention. He said the fever was caused by the virus from the nose and not the lungs. Phew & Alhamdulillah.

Daddy settled the bill and he freaked out when the billl came to RM213.00. He said that i panicked for nothing and the Dr was happily prescribing medicine thinking that i'm dumb not to know that "Profit" was on his mind.. and he swears not to go to Assunta again!

The most expensive on the bill was the prevention inhaler. Cost about RM114-00. Consultation fees was only RM 40 - for a Specialist. This Dr has history records of Umar thats why i brought him there. Daddy said he didn't need that medicine.

I'm being a Mother here. Sorry if he didn't feel the same. Maybe that's how it is in Mars. I freaked out when something is wrong with my kids. Lately i'm having asthma & wheezing too when i get cough attacks. I could feel how hard it is to breath when i wheeze. Just imagine on a small little boy.

He was so pissed at me. And after coming back from the hospital, I gave Umar his medicines & inhalers and off i went to work. That night, Daddy still haven't gotten over the RM200 hospital bill and he said Umar is doing fine and i was just being paranoid..!! he's happily jumping up and down the whole day. He made me feel so bad for taking him to the hospital and telling the Dr. my child's problem.

I don't feel bad at all. At least i know the fever came from the running nose and Umar's lungs are fine. Next time i'll settle the bill. Martians are heartless fathers!


And the Girls..

They all are in afternoon session. Which i'm not very happy about. Last year when Dina was in Year 1, i prepared her for school. Bathe her, dress her, tied her hair up, feed her and sent her. Now both are in the hands of my mother and her maid who is full time with Umar. Its March now and here are the problems/ complaints that i hear:
  • come home in the evening both of them will be in a very hungry mode. i don't encourage them to buy at the canteen because of the food poisoning that's been going round in other schools.
  • didn't bring water bottle. got very thirsty in school.
  • woke up late and didn't come down for breakfast.
You know the reason why i cut Dina's hair short was because was afraid that nobody would tie her hair up.

My mom and her maid are busy people. To maintain 2 household, the laundry, a 1 yr+ toddler, 5 other kids and a handicap. Don't dare to even ask them to do more. As it is they are doing me a favor which i greatly appreciate.

The only solution to this problem is for me to quit my job and become a full time mum again. But who'll buy me clothes???

ON WORK:

Wrote an email to my MD (who's also my uncle) about me not being happy with the company anymore. That i don't think it's fair that a fresh graduate who has joined the company is getting the same salary as i am. Where else i've worked here longer, more experience, more work, more responsibility & commitment.
Oh, the guy is the Chairman's Son! (who's also my Uncle).
Sent the email to his Yahoo acc and not his official company's email. It has been a week, so far no respond or whatsoever. Maybe he doesn't check his Yahoo mail anymore. hmm just my luck.

My heart ain't here anymore. With the salary that i'm getting, i feel that its not worth leaving my 4 kids at home for. Been asking for more since i started working in 2007 but their answer was always.. we can only give what we can afford. And the son joined in.. and there's always money for their next of kins.

Life is unfair and i'm living with it.

Today i collected the Contract from Mindef. The 3 years contract which i was involved from the very beginning. From cutting the Tender Notice from Utusan Malaysia, to buying the Tender Document, to compiling the bloody thing!!

My mum alwasy say, "buat kerja tu biar betul-betul". Stayed up till 6.00am finalising the document and submitted at 11.30am that day. The final Contract Document was flawless.. said so by both the MD and the Chairman. That time it was only the 3 of us in the Company.

The final Contract Document only came out after 6 months from the LOA. and it wasn't an easy 6 months. the number of times i had to climb up that building to provide them with what they asked for - brochures, color card, 10 copies each for each item. Then have to Stamp it, then have to make 10 more copies for them..

Then 'the Son' joined in the Company and we won the Contract. Got a raised of RM500 (ONLY) and so did every one else!! even the runner in Lumut okay.. My worked tripled. my raised should be too.. but NO.

I'm realising that working with Uncles is not a good idea. Their offspring comes first. Not the niece. Even tho she's doing ALL the work making sure the contract is running smoothly. Bull****.

So, giving it another month. Then GoodBye Omahams.. Sebab sikit appreciation pun takdak!!